bargaining

Sitting in my cold and lonely room, I looked up at the ceiling and out of extreme desperation I turned to HIM and said, "I beg you, please give him back to me, make him come back, show him that he is my love and I his. please... I will do anything, EVERYTHING; but just please I want him back. I will pray, I will help the poor, I wont use foul language, I wont do anything wrong I promise". And since then the bargaining began; but how naive of me to think that HE would change HIS mind just like that.

Unaware of my child like, innocent thinking, I offered up my dearest possessions; I offered up my nature, my desires my any and every right deed since the day I was born, I even offered up my soul in exchange for just one day with him... with his love.

All I was asking was one day so I could sit in front of him, hold his hand and tell him that I loved him with all my heart and I would do anything to make him stay with me for eternity. You see I had this whole plan drawn up that one shinny sunny day, the bright rays of the hot sun would fall down on my cheeks. I would wake up to sound of the waves crashing smoothly into each other and his soft cushion like lips gently touching mine, making the adrenaline rush through my veins. I see him leaned toward my face and calmly he draws himself a little closer to whisper "Wear something sexy tonight, we are going out for dinner, take care till then I am late for work". I look up at him, smiling gracefully and say, "how happy am I for that day when I convinced you to not leave me".

How could I not fight for such an exquisite reality that I could have lived if only....